Still...

• looking for a job
• without regular access to the internet

It is interesting how we come to take things for granted; and how, even when we don't, things shape us. I guess many people would say that the internet access is a luxury; nonetheless, it shapes the world I live in, the nature of my friendships, and right now I feel cut-off from news of people I both care about and learn from. As for a job, I just want something to be able to get into. We were created to work. Employment can become a source of worth, which is problematic when circumstances change; but, I do believe it is a gift from the One who gives us our worth.

I am still waiting. The question is, am I still? Will I stop, look, and listen - to what God is doing, what God is saying? Or am I too busy looking and listening with only physical senses? One the one hand, there is the danger of doing nothing; on the other, the danger of doing plenty that amounts to nothing. For someone who likes to be doing something, being still comes hard. Learning to be laid aside by God as well as to be employed by Him, learning to trust Him in all circumstances, is not an easy lesson. But I believe that it will lead to greater fruitfulness if we choose to embrace it.